Some of you may recall my lapse in judgment a couple months ago, as I violated Husband Rule #46. Well, I'm afraid I absent-mindedly wandered into that territory again.
Today we received a brochure in the mail for the Houston Zoo and its season pass program. I noticed it when I got home from work and here's how the conversation went:
Justin: (innocently) So, you're going to join the zoo?
April: (not so innocent) deafening silence
Justin: Oh, that came out bad, didn't it?
Men, here are some more tips for when you get home that might save you from these situations and, ultimately, your marriage. Please watch closely and see where the brave husband in our example starts out strong, but then goes horribly, horribly wrong:
Man: (Preemptive Bribery Maneuver) Hi Honey, man I am glad to be home and see you! I brought you home flowers and some gifts!
Woman: Hey.
Man: (Empathetic Exploitation and Obligation Reversal Maneuver) How was your day? I bet you had a long one. How about I take care of dinner?
Woman: Thanks.
Man: (Denunciation of Zoo Brochure Maneuver) Oh, and I don't think you need to join the zoo!
Woman: What?!?! (swinging frying pan)
Man: (after awaking from coma 2 weeks later) What happened?
Don't be this guy, guys. Or, at least, wear a helmet when you come home from work.
1 comment:
Do you need us to send you the helmet you bought at Sabrina's garage sale when you were 6?
Post a Comment